There’s nothing quite like geeks in love, it goes five hundred and one steps beyond ordinary love. (501 – “501st Legion” – See what I did there?)
There’s a fatuous assumption that you should never become romantically involved with your best friend, but geek love has the power to prove just how rotten anything described as fatuous can be.
Being in love with a fellow geek is like a never ending play date and the best part? There’s no 10:00 PM curfew so you can entice each other with your extensive Dungeons & Dragons skills all night long. Show me your polyhedral dice and I’ll show you mine.
Now I personally have never been in love.
You know why right? Sadly, I’m a mutant and anytime I start to get too close with a member of the male species, I end up essentially mutilating the poor gent. Prom was a bitch. Sheesh dudes, if you really like someone does it even matter if you walk away with all 10 fingers? Hooking up with that “extra special lady” is gonna take sacrifice!
Actually, the simple truth is that I’m just extremely cautious and have yet to come across the droid I’m looking for. So should we ever find ourselves on a date, I swear I will not dismantle your anatomy….PROMISE!
Seeing as I’ve never experienced any type of love, I guess I really have no way of knowing if geek love is as spectacular as I’m presuming it to be. But what I do know is that geeks are highly superior beings who have crazy awesome interests. Plus I have this equation and it seems pretty accurate, let’s see if we get the same answer…….
1 geek-boy + 1 geek-girl + hormones – the opinions of the Jedi Council = being happier than discovering a DVD Easter Egg
(Hidden bonus answer: If you think that any DVD that doesn’t include at least one Easter Egg is tremendously lame then you are a genius, just like me!)
Did we get the same answer? Math was never my forte but it really doesn’t matter if we got the same answer or not, either way I am right and you’re wrong. Unless we DID get the same answer because then we are both right. Right? Maybe it DOES matter. Math is hard.
Let’s move along.
Here’s a look at who I consider to be the King & Queen of geeks:
The King of charm, Seth Green & his lovely Queen of awesomeness, Clare Grant.
If all couples were like them, I’m willing to bet my job as a writer for Geek Propaganda that the word ‘divorce’ would be obsolete. (Dear Seth & Clare, please stay together. I love writing here and I’d hate to lose this awesome gig. Oh shucks, what am I saying? I don’t have anything to worry about, you two are closer than a couple of love sick ATATs)
Seth and Clare are a couple that’s cuter than the buttons on your sweater-vest. (Just for the record: buttons aren’t cute. Would you ever sensually fondle a button? I hope not because if so, I am weirded out that you’re even reading my article. Furthermore stop wearing sweater vests.)
Aside from being utterly adorable, it’s their shared love for all things geek that make them so exquisite. If I ever fall in love, (it’s more likely that I will sprout a tentacle) but if I ever do somehow find myself intoxicated by the mysterious aroma that is love; I want it to be the same magic that Seth and Clare possess, because what they have is a mystery that Doctor Who only wishes he could figure out.
Now love isn’t all sunshine & snuggles, love is an indescribable thing and if we’re honest, I think we can all agree that it’s to blame for the majority all of pain we’ve ever felt in our lives. It’s alright, no one is judging you for still crying over pudgy little Zach that didn’t invite you to his 4th birthday fiesta, we’re all secretly still shedding tears over some little preschool heart breaker. See what I mean? Think of all the gloomy times in your life, I bet that more than half of those depressing times are love related, aren’t they? Love is sublime, but at times I just want to exterminate my hormones and become asexual.
Ah well, I digress….For Now.
So for all those foolishly in love and for all those lonelier than the ghosts in Shaggy’s Ouija-Board that he got too spooked to use, I hope that each and every one of you finds the love of your life. I get a little cynical about love sometimes, but at the end of the day, I truly do believe that love is the most beautiful thing about our existence. It doesn’t matter what ignites the passion, be it a similar devotion to collecting action figures or a shared love for the mesmerizing brilliance that is classical music, love is amazing in all its forms.
Yes, love is a tormenting demon that usually screws us, but I think that’s just all part of what love is. Love must first test us to make sure we are emotionally stable enough to commit to someone else. I don’t know if any of this is right, but it makes sense….Persevere and love will lead the way.
In closing, always remember the following:
Be yourself, be open to the idea that someone actually has enough capacity in their cardiovascular to love you and always remember that you deserve to be loved. It’s quite cliche, but if you love yourself, you’ll find it way easier to discover that someone else can love you too.
Just be sure to keep that self-love strictly non physical, alright? Otherwise you might be too “tired” when your time arrives . . .
As always, thank you for reading and may you have lovely & geeky Valentines Day!